


Beauty and the TF2

by bonk_fueled



Category: Beauty and the Beast (1991), Team Fortress 2
Genre: Crossover, Gen, for solemn-vow
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-17
Updated: 2014-06-23
Packaged: 2018-01-25 12:25:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1648538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bonk_fueled/pseuds/bonk_fueled
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>solemn-vow on tumblr requested a crossover fic of TF2 and Beauty and the Beast.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Opening

**Author's Note:**

  * For [solemn-vow](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=solemn-vow).



> Ok, so, I'm hoping this turns out ok, I'm a little bit nervous about writing a crossover. Characters are as follow:  
> Belle- Medic  
> Beast- Heavy  
> Soldier- Gaston  
> Engineer- Belle's Dad  
> Spy- Lumiere  
> Sniper- Cogsworth  
> Scout- Chip  
> Pyro- Mrs. Potts  
> Demoman- Asylum Guy

Medic walked through the small town, his nose stuck in a book. He was carrying a basket of scrap parts to the local blacksmith for his father. His father, or the Engineer, as most people called him, had been working on a fantastic new invention that was sure to change history. ... If he could get it to work. Many people stared at Medic as he walked through town. He was used to this though, not a lot of people understood why he read so much. Truth be told, he just loved all of the knowledge in it. Even when he wasn't reading things about his future profession, most of his books still consisted mostly of facts. The only fiction he found that he could get into were books about epic battles. Medic dropped the parts off at the blacksmith's and made his way to the local bookshop. "Hello, Medic!" the book-keeper said cheerily, as his favorite customer strode in. "Hello, Mr. Mann," greeted Medic, "I've finished my book, do you have any new ones?" "Not since yesterday, my boy," Mr. Mann chuckled. "That's fine. I'll just read this one again," Medic said, taking Gray's Anatomy from the shelf. "But you've read that one three times already!" "Oh, but it's my favorite!" "If you like it that much, you can have it!" "Oh, thank you Mr. Mann!" Medic left the shop happily holding his new book. While walking back to his house, Medic is is approached by the town  ~~fool~~  bachelor, Soldier.

"AttenTION, Medic! Lovely day, isn't it? What have you got here? A book? Why would you be reading this garbage?"

"Perhaps because I enjoy reading," said Medic icily.

"How can you enjoy reading anything with so many big words? At least this book has drawings," the Soldier says, taking the book and flipping through it, "I have a proposal for you. How about instead of reading your boring old book, you come have dinner with fascinating, new me?"

"I'm sorry Soldier, I really can't, I have to get home to my father," Medic replies.

"The crazy guy can last an hours without you"

"My father is NOT crazy!" Medic shouts as he rushes away.

"That Medic is so peculiar," Soldier says as he makes his way to the pub.


	2. The Commission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I'm not including every scene from Beauty and the Beast. Nor am I adapting it word for word, so you'll notice some... creative liberties. I'm also jumping around to major events so that I can include main points and characters. Hope you enjoy!

“I can’t believe that Medic turned down my offer!” the Soldier yelled to Lefau, his best friend, his partner-in-crime, his confidant, his... shovel, “What am I doing wrong?”  
The shovel stood silently in the corner, like the inanimate object it was.   
“I have all these people after me, but I can’t attract the only one whose beauty is worthy of me! Surely there has to be a way...”  
Suddenly, the Engineer burst into the room. Soldier rolled his eyes and rose from his chair.   
“What do you want old man?” Soldier asked, with his typical I-spent-years-eating-maggots-for-breakfast voice.  
“Th-th-th M-m-m-m-m c-ca-ca t-,” the Engineer stuttered, obviously flustered and out of breath.  
“Spit it out, you senile sock puppet!”  
“The Beast took Medic!”  
“WHAT. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?” the Soldier bellowed.  
“I was looking for parts for my latest creation, but I accidentally wandered on to his property. The Beast, he saw me and grabbed me and put me in a cell. Well, Medic came looking for me, and saw my cart, and he knocked on the door. The Beast wasn’t happy at all with that. But then, Medic offered to take my place for me! I told him no, he couldn’t do that, but he wouldn’t listen. And the Beast, that mother-hugger, he accepted! Threw me out straight away and took Medic instead! You have to help me, Soldier!” the Engineer said all of this with one very rushed breath.  
“Why on earth should I help you?” the Soldier asked.  
“If you help me get Medic back, I’ll let you marry him,” the Engineer said, slightly defeated.  
“No, wait, I have an idea. I’ll help you. But only if you promise to let me marry him after I rescue him.”  
“But, that’s just what I sai-”  
“Great! I’ll start planning tonight. Now, just go home and rest and leave the rest to me. I’ll have your son back to you in absolutely no time at all!”  
“But, how do you plan on rescuing him? I have some sentries that might help you...” the Engineer continued to talk as Soldier pushed him out of the pub he was currently in/owned/never let anyone else in.  
“There will be no need for that,” Soldier boasted, “I’ll take that maggot down with my bare hands and a shovel!” The door slammed shut with the Engineer outside and Soldier beaming inside.  
“Imagine this,” Soldier said to his shovel, still inanimate as ever, “In a few short days, Medic will be mine!” The shovel stood still in the corner as Soldier sung to himself.  
“No one fights like Soldier, kill maggots like Soldier, no one beats people down with shovels like Soldier!...”


	3. Getting to Know You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's the third scene, where Medic meets all of the Beast's companions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long, my talents consist of procrastination and taking a disturbingly long amount of time to do things.

As Medic was left alone in the darkness after that... thing threw his father out, he concluded that the only thing he could do is begin to look around, maybe for somewhere to sleep. He thought he heard some rustling as he began to move, however, and stopped.  
"Is anyone there?" he asked softly. After a moments pause with no response, he sighed and said, "I sure wish I had a light."  
"You called?" a voice with a thick French accent echoed from the shadows as a candelabra suddenly lit. Medic looked curiously at the candelabra and noticed that it had a face.   
"How... is that even possible?" Medic said, obviously flabbergasted.  
"Monsieur, I assure you that this will be one of the minor surprises you receive today," the candelabra replied, chuckling. Looking a little bit confused still, Medic rubbed a hand across his eyes and asked wearily, "I don't suppose you know what time it is?"  
"Nah Mate, that would be me," this time an obviously Australian voice answered. A clock stepped into the light that the candelabra had created. "It's 8 o'clock, by the way."  
"Another one?" Medic asked.  
"All of the furniture here is made of people mate."  
"What is this, some grotesque shop of horrors?" Medic asked.  
"Mon ami, I know it can be a little hard to grasp, but-"  
"How does that even work medically? Is your brain inside of the clock face? Or you, is it the flame? Do you die slowly as you're lit?"  
"Don't ask us, Monsieur, it was some witch's curse," the candelabra said.  
"But surely there has to be some science involved in this. Give me a week and I can rip- I mean examine someone and maybe I'll be able to-"  
"Listen here, ya figjam, I've been a bloody clock for 5 years now, we've tried everything," the clock said angrily, as angrily as a clock can sound.  
Before too much tension from this confrontation could arise, a little clicking sound could be heard coming down the hallway nearby.  
"What's that?" Medic asked.  
"That would be our youngest member, Scout," the candelabra said.  
"Don't tell me, he's a sippy cup," Medic said sarcastically.  
"Not far from the truth."  
The Medic felt a slight bump on his leg and jumped from surprise, almost landing on the poor boy.  
"Hey, watch where you're going, you lug!" a loud Boston accent called from the floor.  
"Eh, calm down ya ankle biter, be nice to our guest," the clock said insufferably. Medic bent down to pick up the small teacup.  
"Hey, you're pretty cute for having such a big mouth," Medic said. Wrong this to say.  
"I AIN'T CUTE. IT'S NOT MY FAULT I GOT TURNED INTO A FRIGGIN' TEACUP JUST 'CAUSE I'M THE SMALLEST," the cup indignantly yelled.   
"Calm down, mon petit garcon. Our guest meant nothing by it," the candelabra said. He seemed very used to the outbursts as well. "You can call me Spy, and the clock is Sniper. As I said, you are holding Scout. You are?"  
"I'm Medic."  
"Very well, you may find a room and make yourself at home. The dresser can help you find clean clothes, if you'd like."  
"This is going to be a long week," Medic said, exasperated.


	4. Healing

Medic pushed the rag against the Beast's skin. He hissed and tried to pull away.  
"That hurts!"  
"If you'd hold still, it wouldn't hurt as much!"   
"Are you sure this is even how to treat this?"  
"I am a Medic, Beast, I know how to treat petty scratches." The Beast gave a half-glare to Medic.  
"This would never have happened if you hadn't ran."  
"I would not have ran if you had not yelled at me to leave."  
"You shouldn't have been in the West Wing!"  
"You should learn to control your temper!"  
A few uncomfortable moments passed while Medic finished bandaging Beast's arm.   
"Thank you for saving me," Medic spoke softly after a minute.  
"You're welcome," Beast said, equally quiet, yet softly. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
"Whaddya wann?" the local asylum man slurred to Soldier.  
"Are you drunk, maggot??"  
"Iss my off hours, yur lucky I came at all ya bastard."  
"Very well. What is your name, soldier?"  
"You caen call me Demo, if ya please. I ain't no soldier either. Now whaddya wann?"  
"You're a soldier now. I need your help. You know the Engineer's son?" Soldier asked.  
"Ahh, that barry lad? Yeah, I know 'im."  
"I need you to lock up his old man so I can bail the loon out and gain his affection. Is that clear?"  
"You wan' me to lock up a sane man to stage a rescue mission that would trick someone into marrying ya? Whass in it fer me?"  
"I was going to offer you money, but let's say we skip the middle man and I buy you booze for a year?"  
"I donnae think yer up fer that lad! But I assept yer offer," Demo said again as he took a swig of his bottle. Soldier looked on with passive disgust.   
"Very good. When will you lock him up?"  
"Firs' thing in the morning. I got excuses to lock up e'ry person in thiss town," Demo chuckled, "I ev'n got a reason fer that shovel of yers."  
"You will not touch the shovel maggot!"  
"Calm yerself. I don't like locking people up. More work fer me!"  
"It does not matter. I will speak with you soon. Dismissed."  
Demo staggered out of the bar, hitting the door-frame on his way out. Soldier hoped that everything would go well.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope I did ok. I've never made a crossover fic before. Please feel free to leave reviews!


End file.
